For maybe the past week or so, I’d been looking at the date each day and thinking of all these birthdays that are coming up. The birthdays are really no longer of significance, but, still, I remember them.
Today is one of those birthdays. For some reason, I hadn’t specifically thought that her birthday was coming up. But today when I woke up and looked at the date, my mind went, “Oh…it’s E’s birthday.” E was this older married woman I used to have a thing for. Of course, nothing ever happened. I am not sure we ever even truly became friends, let alone anything else. We used to live in the same city, but we don’t anymore. So, I used to email her on her birthday and wish her a happy birthday. Unbeknownst to her, her birthday was kind of a big deal to me.
The funny thing is if I look at the calendar, I have an actual ex-girlfriend whose birthday is Sunday.
If I look again, that chick I wrote about in the last post? Yeah, her birthday is next Wednesday.
And then two and a half weeks later, there’s another ex-girlfriend who has a birthday.
I have not decided if I believe in astrology or not. I think it’s something fun. You can waste time or amuse yourself with it, and oftentimes you can twist it into saying “yeah, that fits” or “yeah, that makes sense.” But I have noticed that 1) I just seem to always be attracted to–and initially attract–Leos, and 2) most of the ones I end up drawn to have quite a few similarities. Not sure if I’ve gone gaga over these women because the sign makes them similar or because they just happen to have things in common that I typically like while having close-together birthdays. Of course, the downside is each and every single one of them eventually loses interest in me long before I lose interest in them.
I think about this daily right now because of all these birthdays.
And this is not to say I’ve only been seriously attracted to Leos. I think almost every other woman I’ve really liked has actually been my sign, i.e. a Pisces. But one of them was very Leo-ish, if you know anything about that.
If not…my take, based on experience:
I like bitches. I realized years ago that this needs to change. And clearly, there are different kinds of bitches. I think my female co-worker is a bitch, but she’s not the kind I tend to be attracted to. There’s a good bitch, a bad bitch and a half/half bitch (i.e. a mix of the good bitch and the bad bitch). I tend to like the latter, I suppose. If I had to describe the sort, I guess I’d say they are strong, know what they want, you can’t ever change their mind. They have noteworthy personalities, i.e very interesting women, usually very intelligent, at least somewhat fiery, often speak their minds. But they also seem to think shit either revolves around them or should. They are semi-Hollywood, and they kind of come off as having the acting skills to make it in Hollywood, too. They tell you in very believable tones they give a crap about your feelings, and you want to believe it but you just don’t see it in practice enough to believe it. In truth, they just seem not to have the mental or emotional capacity to understand or even fathom anyone else’s feelings. Everything’s about how they feel. Your heart is like the EKG printouts you see on TV every day with them because of the up-and-down nature of the relationship. One minute, the printout shows nice, calm, tame lines and then the next minute shit’s going haywire. And when they decide they’ve had enough fun with you and are done, you can forget getting them to come back or even entertaining you for one second–it’s not happening.
Almost all the Leos I’ve liked have been like this. No offense to any Leos who might be reading and either don’t see themselves here or simply refuse to. I’m talking about the women I’ve known. Why I like women like this, I don’t know. Best guess is it has something to do with being the youngest in a family of women and having been pushed around by them, as well as other women, all my life. Just used to it.
Still, it kind of makes me wish I could forget all these damn birthdays. Doesn’t sound very much like their birthdays deserve any of my time or thoughts.