Money and the Lack of Self-Control

Ever since I found out I was getting a raise at work, I have been trying to figure out what to buy. Every time I get extra money, I feel the urge to spend some of it. This is no different. Usually, there is some tech gadget that makes it an easy decision for me as far as how to spend some money. But there’s not really anything that I want. I was kind of thinking of the Apple TV, but I was thinking about that before I got the raise. And it’s not that expensive. I’m usually not happy unless I can spend $300+ on some big thing.

I got paid Friday. I was told when I found out about the raise that it wouldn’t apply until the next pay period. But apparently, they actually applied it for the two weeks before I’d even been told about it because my paycheck included that raise.

Oh, not good. Now I really feel the urge to spend some money.

If I could take off work, I’d just go somewhere. I’d go to another city and have fun. But that’s pretty much out of the question right now.

It’s got to be something very satisfying for me. Something that won’t be a waste of money. I hate to say it, but the last time I felt the urge to have something and I bought it…well, that item has just been lying around. It was the iPad. I just have no use for an iPad. I have a laptop, and I have an iPhone. What to do with an iPad? It’s cool and everything, but there’s nothing to do with it that can’t be done with a laptop, especially since I’m not paying for 3G on it (wifi really only makes it good at home, because I don’t hang out at hotspots). And even so, the iPhone is more mobile because of its size.

So far, all I’ve been able to come up with is…clothes?

Yeah, not a big clothes person. But I’m definitely tired of wearing the same shit to work all the time. I already ordered a few things, but I don’t think I’ve even broken $100 yet. Like I’ve said, there’s got to be one big, immensely satisfying item to make me not spend money for a while.

All I have come up with is this cool jacket I found. Granted, it’s the coolest jacket I’ve ever seen. But $300 for a jacket? That’s not really me. Not sure I’d be properly satisfied. I also tend not to wear jackets. Look, I live in the South. The only seasons we truly have down here are warm, hot and booty burnin’ (it’s currently booty burnin’ season). And it rains, but it’s not like the damn jacket has a hood, even. If I moved back up to the Midwest, which I’d love to do, that might be one thing. But you’re talking about someone who sometimes wore flip flops in the snow and who had to lie to her mother when she asked if I was wearing the kind of crap she thought I should wear when it was, like, 7 degrees in Michigan and Illinois when I was living in those places (hats, hoods, gloves, scarves, a big coat…crap like that). Ironically, it was only when I had on shoes that were actually for inclement weather that I’d fall on my ass outside.

I keep looking at the jacket, saying “no no no.” But I don’t have a good feeling about that one. I just don’t really have self-control when it comes to buying stuff I want. That’s one reason I left Illinois–I was too poor there to hang. I kept having to look at stuff I wanted and actually leave it where it was. That wasn’t going to work. So, do I think I can or will resist here? Absolutely not. The only way I might not get it is if I can think of something better that is at least equally expensive.

Ideas?

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